My New, Crazy, Tiring, Exciting, Not-Enough-Time-In-A-Day, Wouldn't-Have-It-Any-Other-Way Kind of Life4/26/2015
Then there are things that make the aforementioned not that big a deal, such as my husband and children.
This is how I keep things in perspective. How I manage to not get down on myself when I look in the mirror some days. When I notice the dust/dirt/piles of laundry/dirty dishes/etc. When I'd love to have a drink with the girls, but in doing so means I have half a glass and wish I had more, or none at all, because E needs to eat. When we're invited to go somewhere/do something, but it's too far away, or it would take too long, and E doesn't handle long car rides well, and being away from home all day is just so much work.
This is my life now.... but it won't always be this way.
One day E will be bigger, and less demanding of my time, so I'll be able to post daily, wear makeup, keep up on the house, go somewhere/do something, and have a whole glass of wine... or two. It will be here before I know it, so while I do miss those things, I remind myself they are so stupid and unimportant. None of those things are more of a priority than being here, in the moment, with my family. Taking care of my children. Trying to be a wife to my husband. (It's not easy in the midst of kids, commitments, and stress.) Sure, I'd love to have more time for my appearance, but I do the best I can with the limited time I have, and I keep it practical. As in, E constantly grabs and sucks on my face, and would I want to tell her no and miss out on baby kisses because it might mess up my makeup? Of course not! So, get over my large pores/undereye discoloration/shiny skin. My baby loves them.
E is eight months old now. Every day she's growing, changing, and it results in a mix of emotions for me. On the one hand, I'm thrilled she's developing and growing healthfully. On the other hand, I'm sad that the time has flown by like it has. It's wonderful that she's sitting up now, sleeping better, eating more foods, enjoying life. It was such a wonderful day last week, when the weather was sunny and the temperature just right, when I got out the umbrella stroller, cleaned it up, and we took E for her first stroller ride outside of the carrier. She was thrilled to be able to forward face, seeing new things, feeling the light breeze in her face, her toes dangling in the warm sunlight. She was just beyond excited, and it warmed my heart in a way words cannot describe. Moments like that... make everything worth it.
The early mornings, long and often sleepless nights, tons of household chores looming over my head, not so glamorous reflections in the mirror, a blog that appears as if I have forgotten about (but think about almost every day), the endless errands, runaway days, and much more. This is my life now, and I love it.
I wouldn't have it any other way.
Bring it on, life. I'm ready for you. Give me all you got... because I only have one, and time waits for no man. I'm glad you gave me a child who makes me stop and smell the roses. I'm glad you've blessed me with the ability to stay home, to have the blessing of being with my kids. But hey, if you wouldn't mind, can you give me a little more time with my husband? I think he misses me....