Journey to Baby #2: Part 1

2/12/2013

Journey to Baby #2: Part 1 — A Modern Mrs.
No Tuesday Tea Time today. Instead, I chose to get personal and share with you something I've been going through lately. I'll start with last Friday, then I'll get into the core of this post. J and I have been trying for Baby #2 off and on for three years. Considering we haven't been having much luck, I went in to my OB/GYN to see if she had any recommendations or could help us medically in any way. She proceeded to tell me that the only way we'd be able to conceive is through IVF, a roughly $12,000 treatment that's not guaranteed to work and isn't covered by our insurance plan. We'll come back to that appointment a little later. Today I want to give you a little back story, because I feel it's necessary to catch you up to where we are today, and so you can understand how we're feeling and what we're going through emotionally.

I've never been "regular". Since starting my period at the tender age of 12, I've never been even remotely close to the 28-day nonsense you hear about. I wish! No, me... I get my period every 30-35 days or so... if and when I'm lucky. It's nothing for me to miss a period, or two, and not have any chance of being pregnant. In fact, as I've gotten older, the gap between periods gets wider and wider unless I take a multivitamin and Folic Acid every.single.day. {Which I didn't discover till recently.}

With that said, it was a miracle I got pregnant with L in 2004. Believe me, I was in shock that it was true. Not because I wasn't ready, but because I had wanted her so.badly that I was surprised it had actually happened. I went on to have a mostly healthy pregnancy, but a very traumatic delivery, and it's because of that delivery that I wonder if it's why we're having such a hard time now. I was told all of my parts are still there, still working, and that having another child wouldn't be a problem, but here we are. Then, in 2009, J and I got a surprise when we found out we were pregnant. We were thrilled! But things weren't right from the start, and in a whirlwind few weeks we went from beaming parents-to-be to a hot, grieving mess {okay, just me} as I had miscarried. Sure, it wasn't long, but I still hurt from that miscarriage, and my heart bleeds for those mothers who carry longer and go through that same loss.

After miscarrying, and after I felt I had gotten over it as best one can, we decided to start trying. We tried for a year, using ovulation tests and obeying all the tips you read and hear about {because everyone has the "trick" to getting pregnant quickly}, but nothing. I went to the doctor, a different one than who I'm currently seeing, and he ordered some tests then put me on Clomid. I took a dose of that, it didn't work, then J proposed and we took a year off to plan and get married. During that time I went in for my yearly with another doctor and discovered I have a tilted cervix. How this other doctor never noticed or bothered to tell me is beyond me, and is actually quite frightening, but there we were. She gave us some new instructions on how better to conceive, and after our wedding, we started trying again. Yet again, another year went by, and here we are, baby-less....

{Please click here for Part 2!}

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